By Tim Collins
This is the story of a courageous man who has travelled a tough road to find himself.
His name is Eli Mitchell.
He lives in Sidney and two years ago, at 62 years old, he chose to transition from being a woman to a man. But before we talk about Eli, let含羞草研究社檚 consider a little background.
The evolving nature of gender identity has galvanized opinions around the world and, some would say, created a disproportionate level of concern on the subject. Canadians have not been immune to this phenomenon.
A 2023 Angus Reid survey found more than half (56 per cent) of Canadians are entrenched in their view that individuals should be identified as male or female 含羞草研究社� while 34 per cent said that is too limiting 含羞草研究社� and hate crimes against the 2SLGBTQIA+ community are on the rise, according to Canadians United Against Hate.
The 2021 census and information compiled by Statistics Canada found that one in 300 people in Canada aged 15 and older identified as transgender or non-binary.
Protests that mirror the transphobia, biphobia and homophobia wave that has engulfed parts of the United States have been on the rise in Canada. Books have been banned while protests and threats of violence have been on the rise.
Within that context, let含羞草研究社檚 get back to Mitchell.
Elizabeth Mitchell moved to Sidney in January 2018 after retiring from a career as a radio operator for the Canadian Coast Guard.
She started attending St. Paul含羞草研究社檚 United Church and became a valued volunteer, joining the property committee and then branching out to take on other volunteer jobs in the community such as driving seniors to their medical appointments.
Then life changed.
含羞草研究社淚 was on a cruise in 2022 and something happened,含羞草研究社� Mitchell said. 含羞草研究社淚 can含羞草研究社檛 explain it, but something happened. Eli woke up and I realized that what I was doing just wasn含羞草研究社檛 working. That含羞草研究社檚 when I came out to myself.含羞草研究社�
It wasn含羞草研究社檛 long after that, returning home, Mitchell announced his epiphany to the congregation of his church.
含羞草研究社淚 stood up in church one day 含羞草研究社� and I had no idea that this was coming 含羞草研究社� and I went up to the mike and told them [that I wanted to transition]. It was something I just needed to do.含羞草研究社�
According to Mitchell, this awakening took a long time coming.
含羞草研究社淚 grew up as a girl but never felt like a girl or, later, a woman. I was definitely never a lady,含羞草研究社� Mitchell said. 含羞草研究社淚f someone had called me that, I would have slugged them.含羞草研究社�
含羞草研究社淲hen I was a little kid, I wanted my mother to put a fly in my pajamas. She wouldn含羞草研究社檛 do it,含羞草研究社� Mitchell added. 含羞草研究社淚n grade four at school, I always wanted to line up with the boys. I liked going out when I was eight or nine wearing shorts and no top, just like the other boys. In high school, I wanted to take shop instead of home economics. The list goes on, but all the markers were always there.含羞草研究社�
And in terms of sexual attraction, things were equally confusing.
含羞草研究社淚 was never a lesbian. I含羞草研究社檓 not attracted to women; I含羞草研究社檓 attracted to men. But all the boyfriends I含羞草研究社檇 had had not been right because they were straight. I was attracted to gay guys, but they were not accessible to me.含羞草研究社�
Mitchell also relayed how he含羞草研究社檇 always wanted a beard (he has one now) and how he finally has been able to join a men含羞草研究社檚 choir, something he含羞草研究社檇 wanted to do for 30 years.
But beyond the numerous 含羞草研究社榤arkers含羞草研究社�, Mitchell said he含羞草研究社檇 always known he was not in the right body.
After coming out to the community, Mitchell started his hormone therapy and began his surgical transition. He also changed his name to Eli and was re-baptized under that name.
And while Mitchell reports that he is now happy with himself, perhaps for the first time in his life, he doesn含羞草研究社檛 see himself as an advocate for the trans-community or for 2SLGBTQIA+ issues.
含羞草研究社淚 won含羞草研究社檛 stand on a soapbox and try to change people含羞草研究社檚 minds about things; all I know is what was right for me,含羞草研究社� Mitchell said.
Asked about his feelings on the anti-trans sentiment that seems to be on the rise, he含羞草研究社檚 philosophic.
含羞草研究社淚t saddens me,含羞草研究社� Mitchell said. 含羞草研究社淯nderstand that I didn含羞草研究社檛 have a choice. It wasn含羞草研究社檛 me making a choice. It would have been a choice not to do it once I had woken up. If I can just talk to people openly as I meet them and maybe change a few minds or educate some people, then I含羞草研究社檝e done my job.含羞草研究社�
And while Mitchell is now at peace with his transition, he wondered how the community had reacted.
含羞草研究社淲hen I made my announcement in church, all I felt was the love and acceptance all around me,含羞草研究社� Mitchell said.
Reverend Cheryl Black confirmed Mitchell含羞草研究社檚 perception.
含羞草研究社淚 don含羞草研究社檛 think there was a single person (in the congregation) that was negative about it,含羞草研究社� Black said. 含羞草研究社淓lizabeth was well known by the congregation and people didn含羞草研究社檛 know exactly what it meant含羞草研究社� nor, I suppose, did Eli. We just said, 含羞草研究社榃hatever this transition is, we love you; whatever happens含羞草研究社�.含羞草研究社�
含羞草研究社淧eople can now see the difference in his zest for life. Becoming himself has released energy and his enthusiasm for life. He now has an anticipation of what the days are going to bring and is comfortable in how he thinks and presents himself. It含羞草研究社檚 in congruence with who he含羞草研究社檚 always been.含羞草研究社�
Mitchell含羞草研究社檚 neighbour (who asked to go unnamed) agrees.
含羞草研究社淚含羞草研究社檝e known Eli since 2015 and I含羞草研究社檓 very happy for him. He seems so much happier,含羞草研究社� said the neighbour. 含羞草研究社淚t takes some courage. Even if he isn含羞草研究社檛 facing people who openly take him on right now, you know that he含羞草研究社檚 going to encounter some at some point含羞草研究社ven if it含羞草研究社檚 just microaggressions.含羞草研究社�
The neighbour is particularly relevant to the situation since, more than two years ago, one of his two sons began the transition process and is now identified as a girl.
含羞草研究社淚t含羞草研究社檚 been apparent for years that she is trapped in the wrong body. She含羞草研究社檚 on hormone blockers now and we are working with her to allow her the time to develop the maturity she needs to make her final decisions,含羞草研究社� he said. 含羞草研究社淭his fall, she含羞草研究社檒l be attending a new school where some of the kids know her, but for the most part everyone has been very supportive.含羞草研究社�
Mitchell spoke about witnessing this transition as an important, perhaps critical factor in his own awakening.
含羞草研究社淚 saw this little girl doing this very hard thing and I saw that she had the courage to do what I wished I含羞草研究社檇 done when I was young,含羞草研究社� said Mitchell. 含羞草研究社淭here are people who oppose transitioning and come up with excuses like the (monetary) cost to society. My response is that you can pay those costs, or you can deal with the costs of cleaning up after people who turn to drugs and alcohol to deal with a broken life. Even worse, you can deal with suicides.含羞草研究社�
含羞草研究社淎ll I know is that I含羞草研究社檓 happy now,含羞草研究社� said Mitchell. 含羞草研究社淚 know that I won含羞草研究社檛 be dying in the wrong body.含羞草研究社�
